Friday, January 31, 2020

TIME-ZONE LABS - Ask Talibah

Recent correspondence from Talibah's desk~

Dear Talibah, 
I've fallen in love with someone from a different time era. He refuses to leave his time, and I refuse to leave mine. I'm a dyed in the wool 30th century dweller, while he resides in the 77th century. What do you recommend?
Mala Yoyl, Miami, Cuba

Dear Mala,
Alas, I am sorry to hear of your romantic troubles! If you are unwilling to compromise and find a mutually satisfactory time-zone, there are only two options left to you: you could bleep back and forth through time, constantly changing your times so as not to lose a moment away from your love one - OR, you could follow the 77th century's marital rituals and purchase your beloved from his mother's dynasty. The going rate is 105 credits per kilogram - hope your honey's not too big! Then you need only to get his shots and immunizations and he will be yours in the 30th century.

Dear Talibah,
I saw the ad for the Rozar concert in an issue of T-ZL and had to zip back in time to ask you a question. How do I upgrade my concert license to a #52? I am currently rated #37 and want to attend the upcoming concert.
Septi Rora, Kansas, Zdaho

Dear Septi,
You must contact your local DCL (Department of Concert Licenses) and undergo another dental exam, psychological survey, and be able to quote from Shakespeare's  masterpiece, MacBeth. Successful completion will allow you to receive your license upgrade. Have a good time - maybe I'll see you there! 

Anything you would like to ask Talibah? 
We'll print as many questions/answers as we have room. 
Just use the Ask a Librarian form at the right.

From the Desk of Talibah© 1993-2020 LeiLani PakiPrinted with permission.

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